divided we stand?...

This year, for the first time ever in the 33 years we’ve been married, my husband, Shawn, and I voted for different candidates in the presidential election. If you know me and Shawn, you know that I spent a lot of time pondering not voting for who Shawn suggested, he’s ‘correct’ about 99.8% of the time. You probably also know that we spent a good amount of time talking about our thoughts. And yet, we were able to cast these votes with no division between us.

For many families, friends, co-workers, that will not be the case today. How we voted will divide us, and be divisive for many. 

Should it be? Should we be this contentious, angry, and divided over who we elect for president? What should divide us and what should not?

I found this short summary of the divisions in the church that came along through the ages. Paul warns the first century church that Satan will come against them in the form of people teaching wrong doctrine, people encouraging sin in the body, and people aligning with this or that leader and not remembering that our allegiance is ultimately to Christ alone.

I did not grow up in church. I did not understand, once I did begin attending church, the ways that the adults often fought. 

The first church that I would call ‘my own’ had a church split over an addition being built and how it should be funded as well as used and decorated. The next church that I called home suffered a brutal split when one of the pastors began a clandestine meeting of part of the church which led to deep divisions, angry words, and much pain. I was a young leader at the time, not even thirty, and I found myself needing to explain to the teens that I led why the adults (their parents) were yelling at each other. One of the elders asked me my thoughts and I said, “It seems like Satan has gotten a hold on our body here and is stirring up trouble.” I had heard the “issues” but none of them seemed to warrant this behavior.  His reply, “Satan you say? How simplistic. When you are more mature you will understand.”

What I did understand was that the unbelievers in our small town stared at us as we fought. Paul rebukes behavior that lends to God’s name being ‘blasphemed among the Gentiles’. Our public dispute and subsequent split, I believe, did not honor the Lord.

I look back now and am so thankful for the witness of my Pastor at the time (not the one with the clandestine meetings :)- the other one!). I watched him be quiet. I watched him quietly try to work through the conflict with individual people. I listened to him pray fervently for the people with whom I was angry. And I’ve never forgotten it. His value for unity and for working through conflict in healthy ways has marked my years since that time.

It seems to me that often in the church, we are fighting the wrong battles, or rather, fighting the wrong people. We draw lines against each other believing that a “sound Christian” could never vote for “that party”... and we add evidence to our reputation of being unloving.

Perhaps you were wondering about the oddness of me commenting on politics and not on my usual refrain: I desire to see the church become a more loving space for the LGBTQ community. I will not disappoint on that count- that is what this post is really about.

While I strongly believe that we need to be people of the Word, we need to understand and apply sound doctrine to our lives and teach it to the next generation. This includes doctrines about sexuality, marriage and gender, and the sanctity of life.

I also strongly believe that how we go about it is also part of the equation. 

The public divisiveness among Christians throughout this presidential election is merely a symptom of our lack of love in our individual lives and the lives of our church bodies. 

You might be thinking, “poppycock! standing for truth alienates some people who are not standing for truth”.  Jesus alienated some people- but most of the time it was the religious people who saw no need of Him or His message. The ‘sinners’ seemed to flock to Him- drawn by the genuineness of His love.

A few years back, I spent many Sunday evenings at a small, local, gay bar. Since no one mistook me for being gay, I answered a lot of questions about what I was doing there- at least in the beginning. Once I got to know people and stuck around for a bit, I would often ask this question, “when you think of the Christian church, would you describe it as loving?”

My most common response was laughter. Over and over again, people laughed out loud at the question.

Why? Because most of these adults I had come to love had spent time in church, and their ‘coming out’ had not gone well for them. 

In 2016, Andrew Marin published the results of several years of study and research in a book called Us versus Us: the Untold Story of Religion and the LGBTQ Community. He found that 86% of the LGBTQ people he surveyed had been raised in church, attending weekly most often. Most of them were now outside the church for the common reason: they felt there was no space for them to be there. 

These people laughing at my question, many of whom were raised in church with a Christian faith background, thought it was laughable that I would put “loving” and “Christian church” in the same sentence.

That’s a problem for me.

Ask yourself the question, “does the evangelical church love well?” Ask honestly and look for fruit that points to your answer.

Our fighting across the political aisle, the disbelief that those who disagree with us could possibly be “real Christians”, is a sad symptom of a heart problem.

If we do not begin to see our unloving reputation as ultimately a problem with our heart, we won’t address it and change. Sin left covered over only festers and damages.

We serve the most loving, gracious, kind, compassionate, and generous God.

 I am praying our reputation becomes consistent with that.

 I am praying that people who enter our doors see us loving each other, and feel us loving them.

Will you join me in this prayer?